The Desires Of A Dominant Man

This blog reflects the desires, lusts and loves of a 35 year old Daddy Dom from Sydney, Australia. The contents of which should be considered NSFW and is intended only for those over the age of 18. All images and content, unless otherwise noted, are sourced from Tumblr and assumed to be in the public domain. Any copyright infringement is unintentional and non-commerical, any offending material will be removed, if requested by the copyright holder.
Who I Follow


It’s all I ever wanted was to worship you. Where I belong at your feet.
— sg

(via thelittlelostkitten)

She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something.
Eleanor & Park, Rainbow Rowell  (via shutupaubrey)

(via sweetsouthern88)

He said, You’re so tiny, like a doll, you look like you might break. I wanted him to break me. Part of me did.
Francesca Lia Block, The Rose and the Beast: Fairy Tales Retold (via kitty-en-classe)

(via theinkstainedlittleone)

I can smell the sex coming off you right now. I could take you down on this sidewalk and be up that skirt of yours in a heartbeat. And you wouldn’t fight me, would you?
I’m a pervert, but in a romantic way.
Julie Delpy (via lolitandaddy)

(via a-littles-journey)

Several therapists reported that BDSM clients often possess characteristics that contribute positively to the therapeutic process: ‘They seem smarter than the average client, I think…They tend to be articulate, imaginative, creative people.’ (Therapist J)
Lawrence, Anne A., and Jennifer Love-Crowell. “Psychotherapists’ Experience With Clients Who Engage In Consensual Sadomasochism: A Qualitative Study.” Journal Of Sex & Marital Therapy 34.1 (2008): 78. Academic Search Premier. Web. (via fortheluvofdoms)

(via daddystigerlily)

Just because Fifty Shades of Grey is out there and there’s a good amount to people in the world that are being stimulated by this erotic novel, doesn’t meant that everyone should go out and try tying themselves up or getting tied up and getting beaten and fucked,

James Deen (via jamesthedom)

All Hail King James

(via mydarkestdesiresrevealed)

(via mydarkestdesiresrevealed)

Human sexuality is drastically misunderstood and therefore remains an incredibly taboo topic. It is almost impossible to take an accurate sexual survey, because the shame people feel often translates into lies. Although we’ve developed our knowledge of sexuality in many areas, our society still largely remains sexually ignorant.
Sasha Grey (via sashagreyart)

(via the-little-sub-girl)

Daddy. No matter how hard I try, I can’t fight you. You always pull me in, and I can’t resist you.
My little to me, via text just now (via cumfordaddy)


I have shared before that I battle depression and anxiety.  It’s been a tough thing for me to get through and has been compounded by things that are going on in my life. D/s has helped me deal with depression by giving me something that provides me fulfillment. 

On the flip side, I find that depression steals much of my drive and motivation to serve fully.  It can be tough for me to focus on tasks, cause me to be moody, and take away my desire to give my all.  In my present relationship, communication has been key in getting me through the lows.  My Dom has been wonderful about listening to me, allowing me to vent and addressing my concerns.  His care and support makes the lows easier to manage and helps me to get back on track. 

I know that there are other subs out there who have considered abandoning their service because it just seems too hard with depression popping up, but I assure you that you can continue.  Having a supportive, caring Dom might be just the thing to get you back on track.  I’m not saying that to suggest that relationships fix problems, just saying that depression shouldn’t stop you from doing what you enjoy. 


  • Here is a small ball of suggestions for those who have just started adding D/s components into their relationship. 

Everything kind of depends on how much you both know about D/s and how far you’d like to travel into the D/s world too.

What I’ve done is made a bit of a list of different things starting from least intense to most intense (in my opinion). You could try them out in order, or out of order, and stop when things get too far or if you get uncomfortable. don’t forget a safe word! :) 

For the submissive:

1) begin to properly address your Dominant as Sir/Master/Daddy/Mistress etc..

2) begin to kneel in their company.

3) let them start choosing what undergarments or clothing you wear in the morning 

4) greet your Dom every day at the door in whatever attire they ask, and in a submissive pose

5) begin asking them when you are both are at home, how they would like you dressed, and always be dressed the way they wish. This can be from nude to a complete outfit.

For the Dominant:

1) become more assertive and dominating about things in the submissive’s life. example: if you do not enjoy when they swear, start warning them to watch their language. 

2) begin disciplining your submissive if they disobey an order or let you down. remember, never discipline in anger, only for correctional purposes. this can range from… literally anything. :P spankings are usually a good place to start.

3) find out what your submissive enjoys, and reward them with that if they have been good.

4) praise them. tell them they are good girls, good boys, good slaves etc..

5) bondage. just hands at first, then legs. nothing intricate, belts work just fine

6) blindfolding

7) spanking for pleasure

8) breath play

9) if long distance - camera play. doesn’t have to be too intense, even just ordering them to sit and chat with you without a shirt on (for females) or with their cock on display (for males).

There are lots of other more intense things like wax play, complete bondage, throat fucking… etc.. but those are a few things that I think are a nice way to start.

Don’t forget it’s safe, sane, consensual. Agree on a safeword, juust in case any one of you gets carried away in the fun. Everyone does it differently :) but the only thing that are similar in all D/s relationships is: 

submissives - Treat your Dom with respect, serve them with love and trust, always keep an open mind and heart.

Dominants - love your submissive with all your heart, dominate them with love, care and honesty, guide them to the best they can be and in return, you will get their complete and total submission.

I support all different mixtures of D/s relationships, just be happy and be safe.


*No one will ever be as pretty as my little girl.

*I’ll watch her favorite movies with her. Even if she wants to watch them three times in a row.

*I will hold her hand when she’s happy, and I will hold it when she’s sad. I will hold her hand always.

*I will help her buckle her seatbelt, because I want my little girl to be safe.

*I’ll help her brush her hair.

*I promise to learn the names of all her stuffed animals.

*I want to give her bubble baths! With candles! And rubber duckies!

*She will be Daddy’s angel. And Daddy’s princess. And Daddy’s spoiled little brat. And sometimes she will even be Daddy’s naughty little girl.

*I will tell her to eat her vegetables or else no ice cream (I’m a mean Daddy sometimes).

*I’ll help her reach for things that are too high up.

*We will go on picnics, and she will bring her favorite blanket and stuffed toy.

*I want to take her to parks, to the zoo, to open fields, and see her eyes widen with amazement.

*I’ll hold her hand when we cross the street together.

*I want to hear her say that boys are mean and no boy will ever be as awesome as her Daddy.

*She will sit on my lap because that is the safest place for a little girl.

*I will have many different bandaids for my little girl, because sometimes she’ll be in a princess mood, sometimes hello kitty, and sometimes SpongeBob. A kiss on top of a bandaid makes an ouchie go away.

*I want to come home to a little girl yelling “Daddy you’re home!” and coming to hug my arm.

*I will check under her little bed for monsters. No monsters will get to my little girl! I will fight them all off.

*I promise to never buy RoseArt crayons. Nothing less than Crayola for my babygirl.

*The worst punishments for my little girl are keeping smoochies from her. But when she is good again, I’ll give her twice as many.

*I will always protect my little girl.

*I want to tell her to stop pouting or else her face will get stuck like that and hear her giggle.

*We will go to PetsMart just to pet the kitties! Or puppies! Or both!

*I will talk to her about her hopes and dreams and I will make them all come true.

*I’ll color with her if she wants, because Daddies are still cooler and stronger than Superman even when they’re coloring.

*I will help her tie her shoes, even if it means I have to get on my knees. Daddies have to do that sometimes.

*I promise to hug her and shield her from the yucks when the world isn’t as happy as she wants it to be.

*If she’s being bratty, that means she wants attention. How can I not give attention to my little girl?!

*I’ll give her kisses good night, tuck her in, and tell her lots of stories.

*Daddies never break Daddy promises.

I just want to make her feel safe, and loved, and beautiful.

On a more serious note, I chose Daddy over Mommy for several reasons.

I am fighting some semi-serious, but definitely life-altering, health issues. My heart breaks when I think about having children one day. I most likely will never reproduce because I will not forgive myself if I pass down my crappy health genes to my children. Their pain will be my fault. I cannot see them in pain like mine. Being a Mommy will make me think of biological mommies, and that will make me sad.

On a more lighthearted note, I connect more with Daddies. I know what little girls want. The more time goes by, the more masculine I feel. I am genderfluid, and although I enjoy wearing dresses and heels, there is no feeling that compares to how I feel when I’m strapped and feeling like a man. I want to protect and love my little girl.

and yes, my Day 21 ended up being my Day 1 :)


Be punctual
Perhaps the greatest sign of respect, which is what a gentleman is all about, is being on time. Having people wait for you is the equivalent of telling them that you don’t care about them.

Project high moral values
Even if you know that deep down you’re not, appear as if you were virtuous. A real gentleman always comes out of everything smelling like a rose.
- In addition to the aforementioned rules, gentlemen (in training) should follow these additional rules when in the presence of a lady. Chivalry may be on life support, but it is not dead yet. Be one of the few to keep this flame burning for many years to come.

Always open doors
This is perhaps the most basic rule of male etiquette out there. It is also one of the easiest to follow so you have no reason to forget it. Whether she is about to enter your car, restaurant, club, or anyplace with a door, you should always hold it open. If there are many doors, then hold them open one after the other.

Put on her coat
Always help a lady put on her coat or overgarment. This is a simple but powerful action.

Help with her seat
If an unaccompanied lady is sitting next to you, it is important that you help her be seated by pulling her chair out for her and gently pushing it back into place, with the lady seated of course.

Give up your seat
If a lady arrives at the table and there are no available seats, you should stand up and offer yours to her.

Stand at attention
Always stand when a lady enters or exits the room. This rule has been somewhat relaxed, so you can stand upon entrance but remain seated upon exit. Nonetheless, if you can do both, you should.

Give her your arm
When escorting a lady (that you know) to and from social events, you should offer her your arm. This is a little more intimate, but serves well when walking on uneven ground — especially if she’s wearing high heels.

Ask if she needs anything
This is one that most guys already do, but helps complete the gentleman in all of us nevertheless. When at social events, make sure to ask the lady if you can get her something to drink (or eat, depending on the event). Show her that you care about her comfort and needs. 


   It is an attraction to youth, but youth can be found anywhere. It doesn’t necessarily mean to “little girls” as most people are not sexually attracted to that. I think most of the attraction comes from the innocence and purity of youth. Think about it, people are always gushing over the things that kids say, the fact that they have no inhibitions, say what is on their mind, and are jaded. Things are simpler, cleaner, and messier all at the same time. There is an evolutionary process with youth that is just so natural. I think that is where a lot of attraction comes from. Besides, even going into babygirls and age play and diapers, I mean everyone loves a cute baby butt and kids always look adorable with binkies, right? Sure it is taboo, but what isn’t? Everyone snuggles a teddy bear, or collects baseball cards. I mean if you get along with kids you probably have some “little” inside of you. It is a part of ourselves we don’t often get to connect with or even divulge to other people. It is a part of ourselves, our lives, our history, that we miss. All we are doing is getting in touch with it, just like in any other type of D/s relationship. The world has such a need for us to “grow up” and do it so quickly that we often take youth for granted. I believe this is our way of taking it back. :)

    I mean the power and wisdom that comes with age as well as the interest in possessing innocence and youth makes sense seeing as I am a little. And there are things like “bed time” etc that would play very much to a Dom’s nature.. in the same token, it allows a Dom to be more sensitive, which I think is human nature, to be sensitive to a person’s needs that you care deeply for. I also think it can help forge a deeper bond (a lot of Daddy Doms also believe there is a deeper bond in DD/lg). Besides, lots of people like the idea of “being someone’s first” and just thinking about that people do often think youth. Whether the first is sexual or not. There is still lots of learning to do, I think, and leaves more avenues open in a relationship. I also think that the emotional bonds are far more obvious because they can be more freely shown, which I think that I would not only need, but would appreciate as well.


G-spot is the nickname for the Grafenberg spot, named after the guy who noted its erotic significance in the 1950’s. The G-spot in women is analogous to the prostate in men (which seems to play a more direct role in sex and procreation).

The G-spot is a gland located behind the pubic bone and around the urethra. It can be massaged or stimulated by reaching up about two finger joints distance on the upper surface of the vagina. If already aroused, some women will find that stimulation of this area leads to an intense orgasm which may be of a different quality from a clitoral orgasm. Stimulation of the spot produces a variety of initial feelings: discomfort, feeling the need to urinate, or a pleasurable feeling. With additional stroking the area may begin to swell and the sensations may become more pleasurable. Continuing stimulation may produce an intense orgasm. Like the prostate, the G-spot can produce an fluid like semen (but not as viscous) which may be released on orgasm- even known to “squirt” a couple of centimeters.

For comparison, the prostate in men is also located behind the pubic bone and around the urethra. The two ejaculatory ducts also end here (bringing sperm from the testis via vas deferens). The prostate can be reached through the anus (as in Doctors performing a prostate exam). Continued stimulation of the prostate may produce intense orgasms in men. The prostate is the glad which produces most of the seminal fluid that is ejaculated (other than the sperm in the semen).

For those who never had a close look at a vulva before and are a bit worried, I should say that, except when quite sincerely aroused, female genitals are usually clearly set out. The clitoris likes to hide under it’s own little hood, the lips stick pretty close to one another, and it is quite likely that if the owner of the genitals is standing up and unaroused you won’t really see more than some enticing tufts of hair and maybe the outer lips. People whose knowledge of these matters derives mainly from Playboy pictorials may be quite surprised that there’s more here than “just a hole”.

Traditionally it was thought that all of the sensation available from the female genitals derived from the lips, entrance to the vagina, and especially the clitoris. In other words, what you see above. It was thought that the interior of the vagina was practically numb to sexual sensation.

Now one of those old coots who spent his”professional” time sticking their noses into other people’s intimate businesses was a guy called Grafenberg. Dr. G. had this theory that there was an area within the vagina, which was called the Grafenberg spot or G-spot, which not only was sexually sensitive but which could trigger bigger and better female orgasms than the clitoris and the exterior bits could by themselves.

Now the trouble with Dr. G.’s claim was that not everyone seemed to be able to find this spot, which he reckoned was analogous with the male prostate gland, and those that did find it didn’t necessarily like it much, and so there was some controversy, especially in the popular press. A number of folks who did find it and did like it eventually soused out the mechanics of the spot, and in recent years there have been a number of good books about it.

The story is basically this: The G-spot is a flat area about as big as a nickel, about two inches inside the vagina. It’s just behind the pubic bone, on the vaginal wall that is closest to the belly button. You can reach it with your index finger. If the genitals you’re playing with are not very aroused then you might have difficulty finding it, or it might not feel very interesting or nice to the owner. The trick is to make those genitals very aroused, and then have a go at the G-spot. The best way is probably cunnilingus, which is Latin for having a lick, but any technique that provides good stimulation of the clitoris will do for starters.

Now bear in mind that I’m skipping over a lot here. I strongly recommend a good deal of foreplay before diving into a woman’s muff, like at least half an hour, and longer if you like. If you can manage dinner and a good bath beforehand, even better. Actually, I imagine that a bath or a shower before sex is a reasonably good idea anyway, because we’re dealing with equipment that can be quite undesirable if it’s on the nose when it’s on the nose, if you take my meaning. Besides, bathing together is fun, if that’s an option.

So, presuming that your woman is content with the preliminaries and you’re going hunting, you’re going to have to begin by relaxing. If you’re so messed up that slamming your dick in the door has a pleasurable side to it (sorry feminists, I’m not certain what the female equivalent to that state is) then forget all this until you’ve had a bloody good rogering or two.

Once you’ve achieved a state of patient interest, slowly start to stimulate the clitoris. You’ve got to be really careful here, because clitori are damned sensitive little beggars, and too much of a good thing is not really a good thing at all. Also, different clitori like different things. Some like very direct stimulation, some prefer one side or the other, others are so sensitive that they like you to mainly stick to the clitoral hood or the labia. Some like a circular motion, and others like to be lightly flicked back and forth. The best way to find out what your clitoris likes is to ask it’s owner, and if she doesn’t know then do some experimentation. That’s fun too, so don’t get pissed off if it takes a little while to figure out what’s good for you.

As I said, my preferred method is cunnilingus, but if the owner of your clitoris doesn’t like that for some reason (“no, my dear, it’s not germy and it does taste rather nice”) then you’ll have to use your fingers. I find that the best thing for clitoris is a nice regular stroke, with regular exotic interludes. Basically it’s the same thing as for penises - you don’t want all sorts of unpredictable jerking around, and you don’t want to feel like it’s caught in a vise, and you don’t want it to feel like it’s attached to a reciprocating engine going at 5000 revs. Take it easy. If the owner of your clitoris wants more stimulation you’ll notice her writhing around and pushing it at you. If she wants less then she’ll draw away. If it’s just right then she’ll sit where she is and enjoy it. Pay attention to what she does. When it comes to pleasuring a woman, she says a lot more with her actions than with her words.

So, you’ve got a nice regular stroke going - say, seven strokes and then something exotic, and then another seven strokes and another something exotic. Of course the G spot is in the vagina, and you’re going to have to know what’s going on in there if you’re going to find it and do something with it. Slowly insert a finger or two. Don’t grab, because that can be rude and distracting.

Now hopefully the vagina that you’re dealing with is well lubricated, but that won’t necessarily be the case. If you spend a long time at this even the juiciest woman can start to dry out, so it never hurts to have a little lubricant handy, just in case. I’d recommend K-Y jelly, which you should be able to find at any pharmacy, but there are lots of alternatives. One that I wouldn’t recommend is Vaseline - too thick. Another is baby oil, it’s too thin.

You can entertain yourself by running your finger around the inside of the vagina, trying to discern its shape. Unless your female is coming (having an orgasm), you should probably find that the vagina is reasonably form-fitting, although some are tighter than others. If your female is not coming or consciously causing contractions you’ll probably find that the vagina isn’t doing anything in particular, just sitting there and producing lubricant. If you bring your finger to the front wall of the vagina then you’ll find it less yielding than the rest, because there is a bone in front of it called the pubic bone, part of the pelvis. If you feel along this unyielding section or just beyond you may find a slightly raised area. This is the G spot. It might not be raised, but it will engorge once your female starts to come.

Don’t poke this spot yet. Don’t do anything with it, yet. At best you won’t have any effect, and at worst you’ll be distracting. You’ve got to wait for your female to start to come. Now this might happen in thirty seconds, or it might take an hour, and you’ve just got to be patient and keep things regular and smooth. You’ll be able to tell your woman is coming when:

she tells you: she moans one hell of a lot and her breathing changes
she flushes: over her face, neck and/or chest
her vagina begins to flutter rhythmically around your finger

You may see all of these things, or you may see none of them. If you miss an orgasm, don’t stop unless you or she wants to. Women have startling recuperative powers, particularly when they’re receiving the right level of attention, and generosity is its own reward. Multiple orgasms are not mythical.

Once you believe that your woman is coming you should shift your attention from the clitoris to the G spot. Keep up the same rhythm, but use more pressure. You may want to keep some sort of contact with the clitoris, but just as a penis becomes super-sensitive during orgasm, to the point of discomfort, so can a clit.

As with the clitoris, you should pay attention to whether the woman pushes towards you, draws away from you or just sits there to gauge the amount of pressure you’re giving. You probably won’t need to vary your speed much, but pay attention to what she says she wants.

Now as you go at the G-spot you’ll find that your woman keeps coming for longer than you’ve seen before. You may even experience that most startling of sexual phenomena, a female ejaculation. I’ve seen three of these (actually I got a mouthful), but I can’t say whether the fluid comes from the vagina or the urethra. It’s quite nice, sort of like salad dressing. It’s definitely not urine, and it is probably polite and hopefully reciprocal to swallow it.

Keep going at that G-spot. Eventually you will feel the vagina draw away from your finger - it becomes bigger and the walls get taut, and not form-fitting, sort of like a little cave. When it does this it’s time to switch back to the clitoris. Keep up the same rhythm. When the vagina begins to contract on your finger again, go back to the G-spot.

If you keep this up for a while (and if the owner of your female genitals wants to stop, then stop - this isn’t a competition), you’ll find that the nature of the vaginal contractions changes. The cave effect becomes less and less frequent and you can spend more and more time with the G-spot. Also, the contractions in the vagina become less simple squeezing and fluttering, and more a sort of reverse swallowing - a contraction that starts deep within the vagina and travels to its entrance. It feels a bit like the vagina is trying to push your finger out. Eventually (may take hours and patience and many tries) you’ve got nothing but these push-out contractions, and you can go on as long as the owner of the genitals wants to, and your tongue and fingers don’t wear out. If you go on this long you’re almost certainly going to need some extra lubricant, so be prepared.

There you have it. At least in my experience, women can have orgasms that last orders of magnitude longer and seem to be much better than those that men can have. I guess I better add a disclaimer that all of this is only one man’s experience, and I could be completely wrong about the female genitals that you have. I’m not certain there is such a thing as device independence where sexual equipment is concerned. I don’t think that any of the things I’ve advocated can do you any harm, but see your doctor if you’ve got doubts. The main thing is to have fun.

(via deviantmanifesto-deactivated201)